The very last Thursday Next novel has arrived, and will in all likelihood be the juicy subject of my next blog post. Meanwhile, erm...
Yes, there is such a thing as less demanding TV than cosy crime, and the last couple of weeks I've been hooked on it. It's The Great British Bake-Off. Not even the latest series with Nigella, mind you, but seasons from way back which are airing on Swedish TV4 (approximately the equivalent to Britain's ITV) and BBC Nordic. My addiction reminds me of a Masterchef phase (mostly the Professionals version) I went through a couple of years back. Work has been intermittently energy-draining, and when you're stressed, even engaging in the airiest of fictional dramas can be a bit much. Now, for Bake-Off, you need no energy at all.
What's the appeal, though, for someone like me who can't bake for toffee (my cooking isn't great either)? Well, for one thing, I like eating, and Bake-Off heavily features tasty-looking desserts of different kinds. In this respect, it draws you in more than Masterchef, where the dishes could get a bit too fancy sometimes. Moreover, even the bakes that are too full of ingredients I don't much care for (why is everyone so fond of pistachios?) look an absolute treat.
The bakes are the big draw – all those astonishing "show-stoppers" – but admittedly not the only one. I'm fascinated by the social challenges the format puts its contestants through as well. Unlike reality shows like Big Brother, which (reputedly) are focused on making contestants behave badly for the sake of "good TV", the goal of Bake-Off (and to some extent Masterchef) is to create a cosy atmosphere where the contestants are as nice as possible. Mostly, they rise to the challenge, and their social skills impress me almost as much as their baking.
The underlying formula for Bake-Off is similar to the one I remember from various (probably ancient) Masterchef episodes. We have The Stern Judge, preferably male and good-looking in a silver-fox kind of way (in Bake-Off, Paul Hollywood). Then there is The Comparatively Nice Judge, preferably female, not always as easy to please as one might think (Mary Berry, then Prue Leith in the Bake-Off episodes I've seen). I can't remember the names of the judges in Masterchef Professionals, but I do remember a deceptively nice-looking male chef who was an absolute savage. Believe it or not, Hollywood is a pussycat in comparison.
Along with the judges, we have the Comic Relief in the form of two presenters with no particular knowledge of baking/cooking. Their job is to lark about with the contestants and put them at their ease, with varying degrees of success. These presenters are probably household names in Britain, but I wouldn't know them from Adam. I quite like the vibe of the latest pair I've seen take on the role in Bake-Off, jolly Alison and Goth Noel who's actually a softie. That said, I'm not sure I'd find their antics de-stressing myself.
Through all these trials, the bakers have to keep their temper and show good sportsmanship. The ideal Bake-Off contestant is sweetly happy in victory – though not overdoing the wide-eyed "what, little old me?" humility – and gracious and stoic in defeat. Masterchef often featured the contestants who had to leave the show looking crushed and talking about how "gutted" they were. Bake-Off, wisely, tries to play this aspect down. The ousted bakers smile bravely, admit that they had a bad week and that it was a fair cop, and turn up in the final episode to cheer on the remaining trio. "No tears on Bake-Off", one contestant reminded herself when she got a bit emotional. Though it would be inhuman to follow this rule completely, she had the right idea.
Moreover, as viewers we want the bakers to get on, and they seem to do their very best in that regard, in spite of a process that appears to favour a selection of contestants as eclectic as possible (considering they all have to be great at baking as well). Every sign of camaraderie or generosity towards the other bakers is counted by this viewer as a point in a contestant's favour, and surely not just by me.
It's a relief to see that the hopeful bakers seem to know what is required of them by way of friendly behaviour. When you're on telly in a programme designed to be feel-good viewing, the cliché about participating being more important than winning is actually true. Forget fierce competitive spirit (what Swedes call vinnarskalle, "winner's noggin"). Even if you were to win the whole competition, no-one will remember you fondly if you're arrogant or a grouch.
It could be argued that programmes like Bake-Off can take as much of a psychological toll on those involved in it as shows like Big Brother, where at least the contestants don't have to act hypocritically decently if they're not up to it. For my part, I prefer to see cosy competitions like Bake-Off as a triumph for niceness – which may be the naïve, consensus-loving Swedish part of me talking. Fika, anyone?
